Story Time
by Rianna Potter
Summary: It's another night in the Weasley household and Ron tells a tale of Hogwarts to his and Hermione's eight children. Comedy and fluff all in one. RonHermione and HarryLuna. One shot.


**Disclaimer:** The five original characters of Harry, Ron, Hermione, Luna, and Ginny belong to the one and only J.K. Rowling, along with the events of Hogwarts. The phrase 'waterworks woman' belongs to Elizabeth90, who is an awesome fanfiction author on this website. The creations of second generations of the Weasleys and Potters belong to _H.M.S. Burning Pumpkins_, _H.M.S. Loony Potter_, and _H.M.M.S. What Are They Thinking!_ of the Accio Firebolt forums. Muchas gracias BP nutters! And an extra thanks goes to Gwendolyn James for beta reading this for me!

**Author's Notes:** I hope you get a kick out of reading this little creation I wrote as much as I got a kick out of planning and writing it. There are one or two parts that probably could have been better but I think you'll live. And I am actually proud to say that this time, this is not pathetic!

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**Story Time**

"Daddy!" Arty Weasley ran into the parlor in search of his dad. He clung to a storybook which had a puffskein on the cover. Ron was the number one story teller in Arty's eyes.

Ron was sorting papers at his desk in the parlor, or at least that's what it looked like. He glanced up to see his youngest son holding up a book in his face. "You want a story tonight?"

Arty nodded vigorously, resembling a bobble-head doll. Ron picked him up as he shifted to the couch, then settled him on his lap.

"What story to do want tonight?" he looked down at his son.

"I can't find anything in this book, Daddy. Do you have any others to read?" Arty looked up, in hopes of a new story.

"Well, I could tell you about when your mother and I were at Hogwarts, if you'd like. I'll even let you choose the year!" he suggested. Arty nodded excitedly. He always loved hearing about when his mum and dad went to school together. "Well, I guess I'll call in the others... Guia! Harry! Leser! Emma Eliza! Rire! Grant! Stella!"

From the kitchen, Hermione watched Ron round up the kids for story time, the nightly routine. She smiled to herself as her children gathered in the parlor. She continued cleaning up after dinner.

"Rire! Leser! Story time!" Ron yelled up the stairs, for the two who hadn't come down yet. Leser arrived looking the norm, but Rire on the other hand had a face full of blue dots. He gave a nervous laugh; and that's when the silence broke. Everyone burst into hysterics. Rire took a seat next to Emma Eliza, who inched away from him as he did so.

"What story do you want to hear tonight?" Ron looked around at the eight of them to see what he'd be confessing tonight.

"The spiders!" Harry suggested. That story always interested him.

"Weasley is our king!" Rire burst out. "No, wait! When Uncle Fred and Uncle George flew away on their brooms!"

"When you were sorted?" Grant suggested. He always enjoyed that one.

"The Yule Ball!" Emma Eliza, Leser, and Guia shouted over the other three. Stella giggled.

"Erm, how about Scabbers and Crookshanks?" Ron was trying as hard as possible to avoid the subject of the Yule Ball.

"RON! You'll scare Arty before bedtime! Save it for the broad daylight!" Hermione shouted over the running dish water.

"Yule Ball?" Stella popped in.

Ron groaned. "Then the Yule Ball it is." Guia and Stella clapped excitedly, and Harry laughed at his father. "Where do you want me to start, then?"

"The beginning! Where else?" Grant answered. A smile lit up in his face. The eight of them loved plotting against their father, since they had found out a long time ago that it was nearly impossible to get past their mum.

Ron scowled. "What do you mean by _beginning_?" He gave a shaky laugh. He loved watching them scheme.

"You know what the beginning is!" Rire said, exasperated.

"Fine. Unless anyone has requests for where to start," his face was hopeful. Silence. "Ah, well... then I guess I'll begin..." Everyone leaned forward, eager to hear tonight's story.

"Well, in our fourth year, there was a Triwizard Tournament involving Hogwarts. Three champions were to be chosen-"

"GET ON WITH IT!" Grant and Stella shouted over their father.

Ron glared at them, then retorted, "Well, seeing that you lot already know the story, I guess I don't have to tell it..."

"Hey!" Arty cried. "I want to hear it!" He gave his dad the puppy dog face.

"But your brothers and sisters already know it, there's no point in telling it again..." He loved plotting against them.

"MUM! Dad's not telling the story!" Leser moaned to her mother in the kitchen. It always worked.

"Ron! Tell them. NOW! Or else _I'll_ tell them the story," Hermione threatened. She continued washing dishes.

"Skip ahead to the part with the Bouncing Ferret!" Rire coaxed.

"Stupid git, that has nothing to do with the Yule Ball," Emma Eliza muttered. Rire crossed his arms and pouted.

"Yes it does! Remember what dad said before about mum's teeth!" Guia reminded them.

"What did you say, dear?" Hermione yelled over the water once again. She laughed.

"Nothing! You lot are going to get me into some deep trouble one day," Ron shook his head. The children grinned menacingly.

"What else did you expect?" Rire questioned, being the brains of the operation.

Ron ignored him and began once more. "Well, when the time came to get dates for the Yule Ball, Uncle Harry and I had been searching for a long time and-"

"SEARCHING?" Hermione yelled from the kitchen. Stella and Leser heard her snort and they giggled.

"And Harry had been turned down by Cho Chang because that git Diggory had gotten to her first I, on the other hand-" Ron continued.

"Had been oblivious to the fact that a certain friend of yours was a girl-" Hermione added from the kitchen.

"Harry's not a girl!" Ron mocked. "And your mum was being obnoxious and wouldn't tell either of us that she was going with Krum. We didn't find out until the night of the ball."

"Congratulations, dear! You've broken your 'Vicky' habit!" Hermione yelled from the stairs, where she was picking up clothes and books and toys.

"It's not like I had a choice!" he yelled back to her, laughing.

"TELL THE BLOODY STORY!" Guia exclaimed.

"_Anyways_, Harry finally found us two dates, Parvati and Padma Patil, so-" Then a ring struck through the house. Someone was at the door.

"I'll get it!" Leser said. She sat up quickly and went to get it. The rest listened to see who it was. Leser's footsteps faded.

As she reentered the parlor several minutes later, Harry, Luna, Aiolos, Brand, and Crina followed her. "Guess who's here!" They all turned to see the Potters standing by the staircase.

"Uncle Harry! Aunt Luna!" Arty exclaimed in his childish voice and waddled over to them. Harry picked up Arty and mounted him on his back.

"How's my youngest nephew been?" Harry asked Arty.

"We're telling a story, story, story!" Arty said energetically.

"Really? Which one? It must be a good one if all you lot are down here," Harry replied.

"Mum, can we _please_ stay? I want to hear the story!" Brand pleaded to his mum.

"Brand, you don't even know what the story is yet!" Luna reasoned with him.

"Two words – Yule Ball!" Hermione shouted from the stairway.

"Hello, Hermione!" Harry shouted up. "So _that's_ why you're all down here? You're up to hear about your mum and dad's love life?" he asked, redirecting his speech to the children.

Ron glared at Harry. "You can help, you know. We can tell about _waterworks woman_ if you'd prefer that instead..."

"Er, that's okay," Harry added hastily.

Just then Hermione came trudging down the stairs with an armful of spell books, candy boxes, clothes, and other things. "You lot need to clean up your things before you hear _anything_ about the Yule Ball," she told her children, pointing at specific ones. "Harry, Luna, would you like anything to drink? There's coffee and tea in the kitchen, you can help yourselves." She dropped the pile of objects on the carpet and motioned for the children to put them away.

Brand chased Rire up the stairs to look at his new potions kit, which had caused the dots on his face earlier. Aiolos sat next to Leser on the couch. Crina followed Grant and Stella to help put everything away. Arty following his uncle Harry into the kitchen, still looking to hear a story before midnight.

As Arty ran around Harry, the other three sat down at the rather large kitchen table.

"We haven't seen you two around lately. How have you been doing?" Hermione attempted to make polite conversation.

"Work's been... keeping us... busy... and with... the kids off... at Hogwarts..." Harry tried to answer in between unsuccessful attempts to catch the sprinting Arty.

"We haven't been around much," Luna finished for him.

"I see you've got the whole lot home for the holidays," Harry commented. To this day he still wondered how each generation of the Weasleys survived with this many children.

"We've pretty much got our hands full. And this time they're _all_ home for the holidays," Hermione replied.

"Why'd you lot come early? We weren't expecting you until next week for the reunion," Ron questioned as he grabbed the collar of Arty's shirt without failing. He pulled him onto his lap and told him to go find the rest and bring them back downstairs.

"Oh, we're just in the neighborhood and thought we'd drop in," Luna answered calmly.

"MUM!" one of the Weasley children yelled across the threshold.

"What now, Emma?" Hermione called back. "I'm coming! Excuse me," she said turning back to the three. Then she stood up, picking up miscellaneous objects on the way over to Emma Eliza.

"So Ron, how's the whole family thing working out for you? Are you still _Mr. Mum_?" Harry joked. Luna hit his arm playfully.

"We've been great. How has _your_ family been working out?" Ron responded, completely ignoring Harry's comment.

"Ron, we just saw them two weeks ago..." Hermione said as she passed between rooms. Ron glared.

"Hermione's still got her spunk, hasn't she?" Harry added.

"Oh, you've noticed?" Ron mocked.

"Well that just proves after fifteen years-"

"KIDS! PARLOR! NOW!" Hermione yelled up the stairs.

"-that you two have still got it," Harry finished. Ron shook his head in disbelief and followed Harry and Luna back into the parlor. Harry grinned brightly.

"Dear lord-" Luna muttered as she saw Brand's face. It too was covered in dots the shade of indigo.

"Don't worry, it'll come off," Hermione reassured her. Apparently she was used to this. Luna gave a nervous laugh.

As the rest took their seats, Guia and Harry stared a fire. Arty was the first to speak.

"Daddy! Start over again so they can hear too!"

"That's okay, Arty. We already know this story. We've heard it many times," Crina told him politely.

"Yes, but you haven't heard _our_ version, have you?" Rire coaxed them.

"Are you lot _trying_ to get me in trouble?" Ron questioned. Once again, they all grinned menacingly.

"It's okay Uncle Ron, you can start from where you left off," Aiolos told him.

"Like that helps..." Guia muttered. Crina and Stella giggled, Rire and Brand snickered.

Ron glared again, which he seemed to be doing a lot of lately. "Well, once the night of the Yule Ball came-"

"That's not where you left off!" Rire told him.

"Rire, he's just trying to get out of going over the rows he and mum had," Emma Eliza said. "When will they ever learn..."

"Why don't you have your mum tell you then?" Harry suggested.

"Actually, I quite like hearing Ron's side of the story," Hermione said. She rested her head on Ron's shoulder.

"Ooooo!" Stella and Crina squealed.

"Story! Story!" Arty cried out.

"Yeah mate! Get on with the story!" Harry told him.

"Fine, but it's only because your dear mum enjoys hearing this," Ron said. Rire snorted. "Anyway, Harry and I were having trouble finding dates for the ball and-"

"_I_ was having trouble?" Harry said, distracting everyone from the point. "Need I call over your dear sister, _Ronald_?"

"Prat," Luna muttered.

"After a while, Harry found the Patil sisters to go to the ball with us. _Hermione_, on the other hand, had already found a date but wouldn't tell either us who it was," Ron continued.

"Mum, why didn't you marry Viktor?" Harry Jr. asked randomly.

"Because you're supposed to marry someone you're in love with," Hermione told him with a laugh, wondering why they could remember Viktor but couldn't seem to find space in their minds to remember to put their dirty dishes in the sink.

"Which is exactly the reason why your mum and dad got married fifteen years ago," Luna added.

"Thank you, Luna," Ron said. "Now do you want to hear the story or not?"

"Yes, yes, yes!" Arty jumped up and down on the couch cushion eagerly. It swayed gently.

"Don't forget the rows!" Leser reminded her father.

"How could I forget?" Ron answered sarcastically. "And I, who seemed to be more concerned about it than Harry, followed after Hermione until she'd tell me who it was. We had a _few_ rows-"

"Few? Ha!" Harry chimed in.

"Shove off!" Brand laughed at both of them.

"Those two were at each other's throats for a whole week. I'd have to say it was worse than our third year," Harry continued his unfinished statement.

"Save it for another night! We want to hear about the Yule Ball!" Stella demanded.

"As I was saying, Hermione and I were constantly bickering about the Yule Ball..."

And the story continued. The two families remained silent for the most part, except for an occasional remark from Harry or Hermione. There were many giggles from the girls and sniggers from the boys.

Ron's view of the events was quite different from Harry's or Hermione's, so occasionally one of them would correct or tease their best friend. The rest got kicks out of it.

"I was miserable throughout the whole ball while Hermione was out with Krum," Ron continued.

"Mate, you were _beyond_ miserable. It was quite depressing to watch you sit there like a moping puppy," Harry commented. Hermione gave a guilty grin and Ron continued.

He told about the rest of the ball, how the relationships of his two friends changed, and the aftermath of the Yule Ball.

"Mummy, if you and Daddy fought so much, then why did you get married?" Arty looked up at his mother innocently.

"Arty, we love each other. That's why we're still together," she replied, smoothing out his hair. Ron didn't turn scarlet any longer at that comment.

"After seven bloody years..." Harry muttered, shaking his head. Ron picked up a stuffed pixie and aimed for Harry's head, knocking off his glasses.

"Food fight!" Rire yelled. Then the commotion began.

"It's not food, you git!" Emma Eliza retorted, though she too had joined in.

Even the older children did so as well, throwing pillows and blankets at each other. Harry Jr. conjured more soft objects and joined in, followed by Guia, Leser, Aiolos, and Harry. Soon everyone was included, even Hermione and Luna.

"HEY! Everyone stop!" Rire screeched over the rest. The fighting ceased and Rire spun around, pointing at his mum and dad, who were snogging on the couch that wasn't occupied by any of those involved in the fight.

Stella doubled over laughing, dragging Crina down with her. Guia began to clean up the mess with Leser and Luna.

"GROSS!" Grant exclaimed.

"Get a room!" Harry added, pretending to be one of the obnoxious children. "Hey! Ron! Hermione!"

"What?" Hermione groaned, breaking away from Ron. "Can't you see I'm busy?"

Everyone directed their eyes to Arty, who was fast asleep on an armchair by the fire, still clutching the puffskein storybook.

"I'll take him upstairs, mum," Guia offered, picking a sleeping Arty up and making her way upstairs, "since you're _occupied_ at the moment." She laughed at her parents as she left the parlor.

The rest just stared at their parents. "What?" Ron asked like it hadn't just happened. Then he grinned.

The children were talking amongst themselves secretively, apparently plotting something. They kept hushed voices for what seemed like ages.

"We've proposed a plan," Rire presented as the band of them broke apart.

"And what would this plan of yours be, sweetie?" Hermione asked.

"Because if it has something to do with what happened in our sixth year, then I'm not-" Ron added.

"What?" Rire asked, bewildered. "Hold on, I think we can think of something better."

"Your mouth is going to get you into trouble someday, Ron," Hermione warned him.

"Hasn't it already?" Ron mock-moped. He grinned at her.

"So do we get to hear this plan of yours or not?" Harry coaxed. "It's nearly-" Harry said, checking his watch.

"It's almost midnight. Almost time to go home, children," Luna finished for him. "Sorry we stayed so late. We don't want to keep you up," she apologized to Hermione.

"Mum! Can we _please_ stay the night?" Crina begged her mother. Harry looked at Hermione for permission.

"Ron? Do you think we should let them stay?" she asked teasingly, as if they weren't sure they trusted them or not.

"Do you _really_ think they'd leave anyways?" Ron asked her. Harry stuck out his tongue at the back of Ron's head. Ron grinned to himself; it was as if they were back at Hogwarts.

_Fin_.

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**Author's Notes:** That took me a good week and a half to write, but I think it as well worth it. I hope everyone enjoyed the ending. Also, I make absolutely no apologies for the long time it took for them to actually get to the story. That's not the way the Weasleys work, my dear. 


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